How Obama got elected to the Senate

QUESTION: Why Did Jack Ryan Drop Out of Illinois Senate Race in 2004 (which paved the way for Obama’s rise)
Posted on December 28, 2011 by Kevin DuJan // Cocktail Party GOP, General Stupidity

Dear HillBuzz,

I had always heard that Jack Ryan dropped out of that race (the 2004 Senate race where Barack Obama ultimately was elected to the Senate). Are you saying that the Repubs pressured him out, or that he could have run if they had stuck by him?

(Backstory: When Jack Ryan was running against Dr Utopia for the US Senate, the Ryans’ (sealed) divorce records were mysteriously unsealed and leaked to the press. Though the divorce itself was amicable – Jeri “Seven of Nine” Ryan had nothing to do with the leak – the records were deeply embarrassing to Jack Ryan. He ended up leaving the race. The Party of Stupid decided to run Alan Keyes in his place. And that’s how Barack Obama became a U.S. Senator.)

Thanks,

A.A.

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Dear Readers,

The above was a comment that I lifted off another thread and wanted to answer here because a lot of people don’t know the story of how Barack Obama’s rise to the presidency was set in motion. The only reason Obama is President today is because the criminally stupid Cocktail Party fools in the Illinois GOP — the very same people who are pushing Willard “Mittens” Romneycare’s nomination in 2012 — demanded Jack Ryan withdraw from the Senate race in 2004 after he had already won the nomination.

Ryan is the ex-husband of Jerri Ryan, a woman who played a cyborg of some sort on the Star Trek series that many people apocryphally believe starred Katherine Hepburn as a spaceship captain; Ryan, the actress, currently plays a mortician on some CBS show where Dana Delany drinks chardonnay while solving crimes as a medical examiner. During their marriage, Jack Ryan used to openly talk about sexual fantasies he had of his wife Jerri, the most graphic of which is that Jack wanted to fly his wife to Paris and take her to the Cleopatra Club — which was a high-priced sex dungeon where the two of them could have sex in front of other wealthy people while utilizing various swings and other contraptions. The Ryans never did any of this — it was purely Jack’s fantasy, and he wanted to do this with his own wife (while other men and women watched them). When filing for divorce, Jerri’s divorce attorney put references to these fantasies into the filing to embarrass Jack (who wanted to have a political career). The intent on Jerri’s part was to force a quick and lucrative divorce settlement so that the Cleopatra Club fantasies would never get out into the open.

In essence, Jerri Ryan blackmailed Jack Ryan into a much more generous divorce settlement than she would have received if she hadn’t made his unrealized sex fantasies a part of the filing.

The divorce agreement was supposed to be sealed and unavailable to reporters; once she had her loot, Jerri Ryan never talked about any of the Cleopatra Club stories again. Her intent was never to hurt Ryan, just to blackmail him for the best divorce settlement possible.

Flashforward to 2004. The Obama Senate campaign illegally obtains Jack Ryan’s sealed divorce filing and sees the Cleopatra Club references. Obama’s operatives release the embarrassing sexual fantasy material to the media, and the criminally stupid Cocktail Party here in Illinois makes the decision to force Ryan to withdraw from the Senate race after he was already picked as the nominee. I need to use bold for this, but Jack Ryan would have won that Senate race if the Cocktail Party GOP establishment had not forced him off the ballot.

Barack Obama would not have been elected to the Senate in 2004, and he would not have been elected President in 2008. None of the terrible things that have happened to our country in the last three years would have taken place if the criminally stupid Cocktail Party hadn’t forced Ryan to withdraw from the Senate race for having sexual fantasies about his own wife.

After they got rid of Jack Ryan, the Cocktail Party decided it was Alan Keyes’ turn to run for Senate…even though he had never lived in Illinois. Keyes quickly bought as small a parcel of land as he could find and the Cocktail Party slapped him onto the ballot to run against Obama. The end result wasn’t even close.

A Senate race the Republicans would have won was lost in Illinois because the Cocktail Party GOP establishment insisted “Alan Keyes was more electable” and they maneuvered to take the man people wanted to vote for off the ballot and force their “it’s his turn!’ candidate in his place.

That’s all in bold, too, because the Cocktail Party is up to these sorts of trick in Virginia and in other states as the 2012 primary race is underway and they are doing everything they can to force Willard “It’s His Turn!” Romneycare onto voters as the GOP nominee…when fewer people want this than wanted Alan Keyes in 2004 here in Illinois.

This is how the “Party of Stupid” has earned its reputation.

But — amazingly — EVERY SINGLE PERSON responsible for this still has his job with the Illinois GOP, is still calling the shots in Illinois, and is currently working for the Romneycare campaign.

K.D. for H.B.

© 2011, Kevin DuJan. All rights reserved.