12/29/2014
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Now that President Barack Obama and Secretary of State John Kerry have launched their new friendship initiative with Cuba, progressives are thinking more optimistically about what else might be possible in the remainder of the president’s term. After all, since the November 2014 elections, Obama has moved sharply left on immigration, climate change, and net neutrality. So why shouldn’t the Left hope for more?
What might be next on the Obama agenda? Breitbart News has obtained one such to-do list:
10. Marijuana to be completely decriminalized under the ever-expanding doctrine of “prosecutorial discretion.” In the meantime, the administration will push for a complete ban on all tobacco products and e-cigarettes.
9. The Federal Communications Commission to reimpose the “Fairness Doctrine” on radio; the FCC to further study whether the same Doctrine can be applied to cable TV news.
8. Jane Fonda to be named Secretary of Veterans Affairs; Ted Turner to be named Ambassador to the United Nations.
7. Wind-energy turbines to be made mandatory across the country, except for Cape Cod, The Hamptons, Malibu, and other coastal enclaves, where such turbines are forever forbidden.
6. The FDA and EPA to team up and decide that coal is a carcinogen. Meanwhile, solar panels are to be included in school lunches.
5. The Presidential Medal of Freedom to be awarded to Alec Baldwin, Michael Bloomberg, David Brock, Wendy Davis, Sandra Fluke, Arianna Huffington, Bill Maher. Michael Moore, and Rosie O’Donnell.
4. Posthumous presidential pardons for Joe Hill, Sacco & Vanzetti, the Rosenbergs, and also a pardon for a living prison inmate, Willie Horton.
3. Al Sharpton to be named White House Police Brutality Czar.
2. President Obama to commit to the complete eradication of both homophobia and Islamophobia.
1. The Obama administration to propose a new Constitutional Amendment allowing individuals born in Africa or Asia to serve as President of the United States; also, the administration to propose the repeal of the 22nd Amendment.
Note: The makers of this list are confident that if President Obama follows through on all ten of these items, he will be awarded a second Nobel Peace Prize.
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